Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
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