pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
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