The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Randomize
