its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
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