Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
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