Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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