You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Randomize
