Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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