I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Randomize
