Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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