I hate all girls vehemently.
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Randomize
