My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...