There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
