You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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