Christians are straight up FREAKS
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
my penis made a compromise with my morals