Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
