i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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