There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
You ruined the universe
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