I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize