Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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