someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
She bit a glass in half.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
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