im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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