Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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