i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize