9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
