He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize