they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
