is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Randomize
