But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
