everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
