she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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