We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Randomize
