Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
