So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
