You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
