oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Come see our sink grown plant.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Everyone says I win the strip club
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Randomize
