Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
