margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
that is very illegal...i love you.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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