You work out of a Hotel?
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
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