It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
