im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
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