See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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