Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
