butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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