good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
