Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize