Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Randomize