Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
