Texts From Last Night

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  (618): View more from Illinois

  I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.

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  (618): I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out. http://tfl.nu/syqz
  Replies (47) Good night (685) Bad night (5214)
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  (585): View more from New York

  Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.

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  (585): Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did. http://tfl.nu/1e6o
  Replies (27) Good night (666) Bad night (12927)
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  (585): View more from New York

  she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?

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  (585): she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year? http://tfl.nu/9o4d
  Replies (58) Good night (9934) Bad night (841)
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  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.

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  (506): No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park. http://tfl.nu/t1o0
  Replies (7) Good night (807) Bad night (2306)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.

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  (205): Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am. http://tfl.nu/dyri
  Replies (6) Good night (1920) Bad night (1095)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position

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  (205): Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position http://tfl.nu/050n
  Replies (3) Good night (993) Bad night (1900)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th

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  (952): Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th http://tfl.nu/jcqw
  Replies (5) Good night (2682) Bad night (983)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.

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  (847): The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling. http://tfl.nu/bvbt
  Replies (6) Good night (2092) Bad night (665)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up

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  (301): Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up http://tfl.nu/i9yn
  Replies (17) Good night (1755) Bad night (623)
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  (716): View more from New York

  You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.

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  (716): You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole. http://tfl.nu/l1gi
  Replies (2) Good night (1322) Bad night (573)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.

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  (541): Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude. http://tfl.nu/4zcp
  Replies (22) Good night (947) Bad night (563)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.

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  (207): I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night. http://tfl.nu/1vni
  Replies (1) Good night (721) Bad night (396)
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  (805): View more from California

  Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!

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  (805): Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?! http://tfl.nu/o9wh
  Replies (4) Good night (612) Bad night (294)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.

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  (330): im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me. http://tfl.nu/dfjj
  Replies (2) Good night (717) Bad night (247)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.

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  (306): you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on. http://tfl.nu/ye8b
  Replies (2) Good night (318) Bad night (704)

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