Texts From Last Night

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  (850): View more from Florida

  Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff

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  (850): Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff http://tfl.nu/wuol
  Replies (12) Good night (3665) Bad night (721)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.

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  (703): No more parties with babies... I can't do that again. http://tfl.nu/7ry4
  Replies (10) Good night (761) Bad night (2880)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.

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  (513): She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before. http://tfl.nu/zkf3
  Replies (53) Good night (8747) Bad night (1016)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on

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  (732): the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on http://tfl.nu/v7m7
  Replies (41) Good night (6836) Bad night (868)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  ...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...

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  (410): ...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear... http://tfl.nu/jb6u
  Replies (14) Good night (6165) Bad night (1001)
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  (289): View more from Ontario

  he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went

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  (289): he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went http://tfl.nu/wqc9
  Replies (35) Good night (1065) Bad night (8552)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?

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  (+44): Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance? http://tfl.nu/duxd
  Replies (9) Good night (1189) Bad night (2113)
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June

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  (864): Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June http://tfl.nu/abqo
  Replies (16) Good night (1962) Bad night (1923)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.

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  (402): At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket. http://tfl.nu/qyc9
  Replies (3) Good night (774) Bad night (815)
• Favorite

  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?

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  (506): HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!? http://tfl.nu/h0ub
  Replies (9) Good night (1140) Bad night (660)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.

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  (404): Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has. http://tfl.nu/tiit
  Replies (4) Good night (450) Bad night (787)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.

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  (616): Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing. http://tfl.nu/c8zk
  Replies (4) Good night (456) Bad night (625)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.

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  (732): The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack. http://tfl.nu/qgyn
  Replies (3) Good night (620) Bad night (275)
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.

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  (316): I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger. http://tfl.nu/dz7z
  Replies (1) Good night (432) Bad night (243)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.

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  (816): Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less. http://tfl.nu/zrff
  Replies (0) Good night (357) Bad night (172)

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