i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
